The Lonely Soldier Would you like some more pancakes Mike? No thank you, I said. How about more bacon? No thank you I repeated softly. You have filled my stomach well. Mr Jensen brought over another cup of coffee. Everyone needs more coffee he said with a smile. He and his wife were the friendliest and most hospitable people I had ever met. More coffee does sound like a winner I told him. Sure Mike, said Mrs. Jensen. Drink his coffee, but snub your nose at all this food I made just for you. She looked at me with a smile. I miss cooking for my children she said. They are all grown and out on their own now. It can get very lonesome with just me and Jim here. Yes I'm sure it does, especially at this time of year. I was in the northern parts of the state of Maine, and it was mid January. Desolate and cold. The landscape was burried under many feet of snow, which had accumulated since first snowfall back in November. One hundred and ninety two inches fell that year, and none of it had melted much at all. The mounds were tremendous. When I had walked up to the old farm house from across the field the night before, I was walking on frozen snow, almost nine feet from the ground itself. With everything all white I could not see the driveway. When I fianally reached the house though, I saw it. The long driveway was like a box cut into the snow. Each snowfall, Mr Jensen set the snow blower higher and higher, throwing the snow up and over the top. I don't think he would have much more luck getting it up and over, if it didn't warm up and melt a bit. Yes Mam, I said, I can surely understand how one could be lonesome here. It's not that bad said Jim. Just then the phone rang, it was my dad calling back. Jim handed me the phone. Hi dad, how did you make out? I asked. Your flight is set for eleven Am, he said, I'll meet you at Newark International when you land. Don't worry he said, everything will work out. I knew dad was right, but I was upset and afraid. I had just turned twenty in the beginning of the month, and being so far from home for the past two years, and on such a desolate post, had really taken it's toll on me mentally. Ok dad I said, I'll see you soon. Mr. and Mrs. Jensen drove me to the airport. They even hugged me like I was one of theirs, when I left them and entered the terminal. Good luck son they said. I forced a smile, and waved from the door and off into the terminal I went never to see them again. Maybe I should back up a little so you understand the whole story. My name is Michael. When I graduated high school, I immediatedly joined the military. I spent the long hot summer training in Texas, at Lackland Airforce Base. In September, I was assigned my permanent duty station at Loring Airforce base in Maine. It was on the Canadian Border. I was in security. Security, as in guarding our nuclear loaded b52 aircraft, and our refueling planes, and our fighters, the F 105's. Also included in our post, was the nuclear storage area. It was security's job to keep our nation safe and the bombers ready to fly at a moments notice, should the need arise. It was okay in the spring, summer, and fall, but working outside as a guard in the harsh winters of northern Maine, was more than a lot of guys could handle. Twelve long hours alone, walking your post through the cold icy nights, was the most boring assignment there was. We were in the middle of nowhere. Even when we were not at work, it was a lonely place to be. The base had a nickname, everyone called it boring Loring. There was a movie house and a bowling alley, but how many games or movies can a guy watch or play. So the number one hot spot on base, was the NCO club . The non commissioned oficers club. It was for the enlisted members, although some of the officers also went there. It was easy for them to pick up enlisted girls. Kind of like the Doctors and nurses thing in hospitals. Or the rich guys with the hot cars and poor girls. I never ascribed to these as I was a talker. I was able to meet girls fairly easy. I wasn't afraid of them. The officers club was completely off limits for enlisted personel. It was very unfair. It was hard enough to meet a girl without the upper echelon in our club, and when they were there, it seemed the girls leaned in the direction of the bars and stars. And for the record, in order to fly a plane, you had to be an officer, and to be an officer, you needed to be a college graduate. No one ever mentioned that at the recruiting station. Also, we had a voluntary military. Voluntary that is, to join. Once you are in, you cannot get out until your tour of duty is finished. " The Voluntary Contract". If you try and leave, it is desertion. There is also awol, absence without leave. That is when you do not show up for duty without permission to be off. If you are ill, you must go the the base medical center to be given the day off. There is no sleeping in or being late. I found myself, like many many others, in the NCO club every night. There was nothing else to break the monotony, other than to gather there and drink. Unlike a lot of the guys, I was quite outgoing. I would walk around the club and talk to any girl who would listen. If there were twenty girls in there, I would ask everyone of them to dance. I always found someone who would. Once I had her attention, it was easier to talk and get aquainted. I felt sorry for all the men who just stood in the place and drank to oblivion. Most every one I knew on that god forsaken base, was on the road to becomming an alcholic. As time went on, I learned my way around the two local towns nearest the base. First there was the tiny town of Limestone. That was the town the base was in. Second was the small but larger town of Caribou. There were a few stores, a few reseraunts, and a few local drinking establishments. Most of the towns people were poor. Many lived off the land to some degree. There was a potatoe processing plant, that was the largest employer in the county, other than the base. Also there was seasonal work in the fields that ended with the harvest. Just like near the mexican border, where the immigrants cross over and work for peanuts harvesting in the south. The north is no exception. Peanuts paid to hard working people so the corporate bottom line is bigger. It seems to me that everywhere in America, we are paid peanuts, while the elite live like kings and queens off our hard labor. In fact, even here in the US Military, we are paid very poorly. We are promised the world when recruited, and get left hanging in the wind when we are finished serving our country. Anyway, on a Friday night, on one of my excursions into town, to the pub of coarse, I met a young girl when I was filling up with gas. Her name was Merlene. She was a couple years younger than me. We began talking, and it seemed we hit it off. She said at first that she didn't date guys from the base, but after chatting for just a few minutes time, she agreed to have a drink with me. The drinking age I might add, was 18 at the time. We sat in the bar talking for almost five hours, and then we wound up at her house. She lived with her brother and sister, her mom, and her moms boyfriend. I was allowed to stay the night, in her bedroom, and in her bed. Her sister and brother were also in the same room. The trailor was small but that was all there was. Nothing happened that first night. We talked a bit more and fell asleep. In the morning, I met her family. Two months later I was living there with them all, adding to the cramped lifestyle. They taught me to play pinacle. Night after night, and any days I was off, we sat around the table drinking rum and coke, smoking cigerettes, and playing pinacle. I would spend all my money on the alcohol and butts at the base exchange. It was cheaper there than anyplace else. I added whatever I had left for food. Many a night we had hot dogs and potato soup for dinner. Even with the money and food source low, we never ran out of booze and butts. We had our priorities. As the trailor always had people in it, no one had a job other than me, Merlene and I used the back seat of my old Chevy Impala for our romantic time together. Then back to the table for cards, butts, and booze. She never once complained. I guess that was just the life style they had. I was just an add on to an already broken unit. Time went by and well always having Merlene around, I got even more complacent. She was growing tired of the same old things day after day. So one night on the weekend, I decided to bring her to the base and party there. We drank with some of my coworkers, also security, and a new girl that one of the guys was dating. By midnight I was smashed. I went and laid down for about and hour, and when I woke up, right on the floor in the dayroom where I was sleeping, was Merlene, the new girl, and five guys going at it. I freaked out. I couldn't believe Merlene was involved in it all. I thought we were in love. I called her name but she didn't even look up. I left the building and went to my car as fast as I could. I was devestated. In shock even. I did however, grab some beers off the floor, and took them with me. My mind was racing as I started the car. I couldn't belive it. It felt like my heart was being torn from my chest. My breathing was sporatic and my stomach hurt. I drove around the base for a short while and then decided to head home. Home where I grew up. When I was through the gate and off the base, I floored it. I was flying down the snow covered roads as fast as the car would go. I kept drinking the entire time. I wasn't an alchoholic before I joined the military, but now, two years later on a remote base station, I guess I was hooked. I got about ninety miles south, when I must have fallen asleep or was just too drunk to see, when I skidded off the road and flipped the car into a huge mound of snow at an intersection in the highway. When I opened my eyes, there was a guy standing by the car. Are you okay he asked me. Yes I slurred my answer to him. Let's get you out and into the house he said. I looked at him and then the house behind him. It was the only one around. I had a few bruises from bouncing around in the car, but other than that, I was alright. The snow mound was much softer than a wall or tree, or even the road for that matter. I climbed out and looked at the car. It was fine other than being upsidown and stuck in the snow. Drunk, heartbroke and dumbfounded, I threw him the keys and said keep it, and started walking south toward my home, hundreds of miles away. There is no place to go you will freeze to death he said. Like a drunken stubborn fool, I proceeded to walk away and down the deserted highway. I had not seen a single car for the last seventy five miles. After and hour I was sobering up and it was getting even colder out. The snow like most nights was lightly falling, and falling steady. I walked and walked, and even ran at times to try and warm up. There was nothing but cold emptyness all around me. God was I stupid. I kept thinking about Merlene and her betrayal. Such a brutal sight for a loyal loving guy to have to see and endure. I cried, yelled and cursed out loud a lot that night. After a few hours I was beginning to feel numb. My feet were so cold that they hurt. The cold was now through my body and my temperature had to be lowering. I was thinking about just laying in the snow and going to sleep, when in the distance I saw a light. I felt a small surge of adrenilene surge through me and I trudged onward toward the light. It only took about ten minutes to get close enough to realize it was a house. I stepped off the road and climed my way up onto the snow. I walked toward the light, sometimes my legs sinking up to my thighs in the more recent snow cover, but most of the snow had a good crust and was able to sustain my weight. When I reached the house I knocked hard on the door. I waited and knocked again. If no one answers I am going inside I thought. I have no choice. Just then, a light inside came on and a man answered the door. He brought me right inside and called to his wife to bring blankets fast. A woman appeared in seconds carrying an armload of woolen blankets. They put one under me, and then two on top of me, as they laid me down on the couch. The woman left the room and returned in a few minutes with a cup of hot coco. The man had taken off my combat boots and was gently rubbing my feet to warm them up. Here said the woman handing me the cup. This will warm your insides she said. Thank you so much I said to them, I thought I was going to freeze to death. What happened asked the man? Then he turned to the woman and tilted his head making some kind of gesture to her. She left the room and I heard what sounded like her walking up the stairs. I introduced myself and then began telling him my story. He was very understanding. I cried again when sharing about the episode of Merlene and the others in the day room. He gave my head a hard rub like a father would, and said everything will work out. Try and relax. You can spend the night here. I took a sip of the hot chocolate. It felt great running down my throat and into my stomach. The woman was right. It was warming my insides quickly. My name is Jim Jensen, Mike, and my wife is Karen. She is upstairs getting one of the kids bedrooms ready for you to sleep. Thank you I said again. In the morning you can call home if you like said Jim. Yes I said, that would be great. Mrs. Jensen was back downstairs with us now and asked me if I was hungry. No I said, lying. I did not want to impose any more than I already had on them. I was feeling warmer and I was hungry. Alright then Mike, said Jim, follow me. I'll show you where you are sleeping, and where the bathroom is. I followed him upstairs and down the hall. It was a big old farmhouse with stairs to the upper levels in the front foyer, and a back set of stairs leading back down into the kitchen. Here ya go Mike, said Jim opening the door for me. It was their oldest childs room. She was married and living in Bangor. It was a cozy room. The bed was big with the canope type curtain on it. The room was clean, and looked as if it had stopped in time. The wall paper was an old country print, and the dressers had white lacy doylies under the jewlery box and under the old lamp. I saw an old balarina music box that was older than me on the three legged wooden stand in the corner, and a black and white tv with rabbit ears on another small wooden table. The bathroom is the next door on the left said Jim. If you need anything please just holler. We are only two rooms down on the right. Ok I will sir I said. Jim, call me Jim. Alright then Jim, I will. He smiled and left the room. I crawled into the bed and under the covers. I was warm and comfortable, and extremely tired. I turned over once or twice, and then fell fast asleep. The smell was coming up the back stairs and wafting into my room. I opened my eyes and could see the sunlight shining in through the edge of the white pulldown shade. I was starving and the smell of the food and coffee was intoxicating. I had no hang over, but I had a broken heart and a crushed soul. I got up and went to put my clothes on but they were gone. Mrs. Jensen called my name from the hall and asked if she could enter. I sat on the bed and covered myself with the sheet and blanket. Yes I said, please come in. As she entered, her arms came through the door first, holding my clothes all washed and folded. Before I could say a word, she said, I thought you would like to have clean clothes after your shower. They were a bit of a mess from your ordeal yesterday. I thanked her and she laid them on the bed and said, breakfast is ready when you are, oh and the towels are in the closet on the right side. Thank you so much Mrs. Jensen, I really do appreatiate all your hospitality. Anything we can do to help she said. We believe in doing unto others. I can only pray that if my children ever need a hand, that some one will be there for them. I'll see you downstairs she said, and then left the room. I took a hot shower and got dressed in my clean clothes. I hadn't had anyone do anything for me since I joined the service. I was on my own and did whatever it took to get by. Cooking, laundry, ironing, even sewing the stripes and patches on my uniform. It felt good to feel the love these folks had. If I ever needed it, it was right now. I headed down the back stairs to the kitchen, following the aluring aromas. Good morning Mike said Jim, how ya feeling today. Better thank you I said. Jim handed me the phone. Call your dad he said. I'll call collect I told him. Don't be rediculous he said. Just make the call. I dialed the phone and seconds later my mom answered the phone. I gave her a quick overall rundown of what was going on. It had been a year since I had called them. Booze, butts, and cards. Priorities. Mom said she loved me and put dad on the phone. I was all choked up telling him what happened. He said he would get me a flight as soon as posible. He was gonna pay for me to get a ride to the airport too, but the Jensens wanted to drive me. It seemed important for them to do it. Okay said dad, Ill call you back soon. okay dad I said and cried as I hung up. Mrs. Jensen hugged me and like her husband, told me everything would work out and be alright. After hugging me, she started putting the food infront of me. I ate until full. After dad called back with the flight information, we left for the airport. Merlene was on my mind, but also was the frightening thought, that I was going to be listed as awol, come monday morning. I was afraid, but I really needed to go home. End part one.